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Fappuccino Cockshell

Sale price£4.49

How do you take your coffee?

"Well not with a side of fucking jizz Ross"

Ok... I hear you. But if you like milk in your coffee then it's probably the same. I'm guessing? I wouldn't know, I don't have milk in my coffee. I take it like your mom does. As I imagine she can't be arsed for milk either and prefers a proper coffee.

FYI, whilst I'm here, if you like milk in your coffee then you don't really like coffee, you just think you do. It's a bit like smothering your steak in some BBQ bullshit. Stop it. All you need for a good steak is salt and pepper and some oil. Fuck all that other bullshit. It's the same with coffee. Just give me a coffee.

Now I want a coffee. And it's fucking 1AM as I'm writing this.

Also... genius name, right? Fappuccino instead of Frappuccino? Excellent.


Actual Scent: Fresh Coffee. No thank you, I take my coffee black.


Cockshell Details

Our Cockshells are basically 6 cube clamshells with little dicks on the cubes. Much like our Teddy Clamshells that have a Teddy on the cube, these just have cocks. Because people love cocks. Well, some do at least.

Size: Is that what everyone wants to know when it comes to a Cock(shell)? How big is it? Does it matter, though? It's not about the size, right? But our Cockshells are actually BIGGER than our Teddy Clamshells and weigh around 70-75g! It's big enough to get the job done.

Wax: Our wax is 100% soy wax mixed with mica powder to colour it and give it that shimmer! Sometimes glitter is used too and that's bio-degradable.

Our products, to the best of our knowledge, are all vegan and cruelty-free. If you have any specific concerns then please get in touch.

We are CLP compliant and fully insured. The CLP can be found in the product images before you even purchase.

Fully recyclable PET plastic clamshell with Resin identification code for practical, household recycling. Just like recycling a bottle of pop!

Fappuccino Cockshell
Fappuccino Cockshell Sale price£4.49